A Five Year Awareness

A friend recently asked me, “ What would you say you has been the biggest transition in your life in the past five years, and what did it teach you?”  I was shocked that I had an internal answer immediately.

As I took in the depth of the questions I realized that the marriage of my two sons, the inclusion of two amazing women in my life, and the birth of four grandchildren had meant life as I now see it is totally different.

In 2010 both of my son’s made a commitment to their partners for a future together.  They shared decisions to marry, plans to unite families and each daughter-in-law to be arranged and planned unique experiences while including me in the process more than I had ever thought would be possible. The gift of getting to know these families and knowing that we get to support our children as they start in a new phase of life felt as though I was entering a new phase of life.

Both of these celebrations were as different as they could be. One was a commitment ceremony held by a river stream with guests sitting on hay bales, and the other was a church wedding with a white beaded strapless wedding dress and groomsmen in tuxedos.  The cakes in each were made by the family-one wedding had seven layer cakes meeting the vegan, gluten free, and vanilla, chocolate cake desires (and decorated by the sister-in-law to be with flowers.)  The other looked as professional as possible and made by an aunt. Music, dancing and great food were part of the after ceremony celebrations.

The first grandchild came a few months after the wedding, the other two years. Both have had their second now. We have two grand daughters and tow grandsons. We have celebrated many birthdays, holidays, and family events. WE have mourned losses together.  We have helped moves across states happen.

I know love at a level I have never understood before. I never knew how wonderful it feels to love so many people so much. I know sharing and caring and letting go so others can lead.  I have more fun making sure we can make things happen to support the passions in all our family member’s lives.

When I think of family I repeat my mother-in-law’s favorite mantra:

“All shall be well and

All shall be well, and

All manner of things shall be well.”

Julian of Norwich

Special Treats in Grand-parenting

I am surprised that I can experience two amazing roles of being a grandparent from two different perspectives in one weekend.

In Tulsa, we had a sleepover with one year old Simone and 5 ½ year old Millie. The evening includes dancing, dinner, and Papa holding Simone as she feel asleep on his chest. The morning started with Millie, Simone and I were all out on the porch listening to birds, watching the Koi in the pond, eating more blueberries than I had ever imagined, and then playing on the floor.

Simone crawled with such a dedicated gait, across the room, stood up next to the coffee table, went to her diaper bag, rummaged through it and discovered a green polka dot dress with a ruffle on it. Victorious, she crawled to the kitchen,  bringing  the dress with her, where I stood .

She locked her eyes with mine, and with one hand holding onto the dress, held her sleep shirt up and almost over her head with the other. She was ready to change clothes! I must admit, one of my favorite things about being a grandparent is watching our grandkids tell us exactly what they need. They know how to do it so beautifully!

In New Mexico, the grandkids went camping with their parents around Las Vegas. At 3 1/2 and 2 years old, Sage and Ash are little mountain men. They hike, explore, sleep in a tent, and are up for adventure. When they called Cece and Papa after the weekend trip they told us they loved climbing and camping and seeing all the animals. Hearing the joy of the whole family from their weekend adventure warms my heart. It makes planning another trip as soon as possible another must!

I treasure these connections.